One girl's view of disease as a gift, not a burden.
There is a weight. As time continues to pass, a weight comes with trying to write a blog post. A weight that grows slightly heavier with the gathering of so much to say and nothing to say at all. Like unused cargo in the trunk of a car. Camping gear or something useful that is […]
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The word “okay” is incredibly underrated. Whenever I get a call or an email from someone newly diagnosed, I feel so privileged they have chosen to speak with me. To connect, to vent, to cry, to express anger, or to simply ask a few of the hundred questions we all have at the very beginning. […]
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Practicing restraint may be my biggest life challenge. I’ve been feeling so, so good. Generally speaking, since my Multiple Sclerosis diagnosis. Generally speaking, since I crossed over 40 and my body began screaming for me to go to bed before 11pm and eat less junk. Generally speaking, I have been feeling great. Around the same […]
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My company is making me use my vacation time and I am learning. It’s totally fair. I don’t ever take enough time off and I have now racked up enough days to gift a trip to a small army. I get it. Paid vacation is not to be taken for granted and I don’t… but […]
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My treadmill is making me question reality. 30 days in quarantine and I feel like I am staving off madness through travel. Travel via a 32″ screen attached to an oversized treadmill situated in an undersized bedroom. Yet I feel that I am actually exploring other countries. The persuasions our mind will create to survive. […]
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So this one time, at MS camp, a surgeon temporarily removed most of my ear. And I didn’t realize it until after I woke up. Yep, it’s finally time to tell that story. Because lately, I’ve been feeling a bit sad. A little stuck. Slightly down in the dumps I guess you could say. I’ve […]
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My mom passed away two years ago and I almost called her twice this week. When incredible or horrific things happen in my life, I still have this urge to call. When I say urge, I mean I literally forget for 1 micro-second that she is no longer available to me on this Earth and […]
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My community is on fire and so is my heart. I may have a chronic illness and I may have chronic dating problems in Los Angeles, but I have formed a group of friends that are solid and loyal and full of love. We are all so very different, but we are there for one […]
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I am actively working on getting better at letting go. I have been for some time now. My best friend from high school and I sometimes talk about who we used to be and the things we used to do. An example that gets brought up often is the obsession I had with money. I […]
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Paddle boarding is like living with MS. Ever since being diagnosed ~ 16 months ago already ~ I have been pushing my body. To become more and more healthy, but also to explore outdoor activities and sports I’ve always wanted to try. Besides, if you’ve got Multiple Sclerosis, you can never get enough Vitamin D. […]
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We’re back together and it’s better than ever. When I was in college I smoked weed almost every single day. This allowed me to tightly draw the shades over my deepest 20-year-old issues living in NYC with no money and no confidence. Waitressing for $1100 per week didn’t seem to go anywhere. Unable to afford […]
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Life is full of patterns. Routine and predictable bits and pieces of energy that seem to always come back around, no matter what you do. This blog will usually attempt to point out the impermanence and flow of it all, but not this post. Let’s take a moment to celebrate the patterns. And with MS, […]
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One year ago today I almost lost my eyesight forever. One year ago today I spent the night in a hospital, overwhelmed with incredible fear and loneliness. One year ago today I was diagnosed with MS and it was the best thing that ever happened to me. The first week of April 2017, physically I […]
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Tracy's Life with MS 